Who Taught you to Pray?

How did you learn to pray? Did you pick it up by listening to others around you (which would be OK if they know what they are doing) or did you pick up it by osmosis? Do you ask God for your material or do you come up with it on your own? Have you ever be formally mentored in prayer? If not, would you be interested in that?

Praying to Find my Car Keys

Yesterday, I couldn't find my car keys to save my life. Four of us were looking for them to no avail. I knew I had brought them home (because my truck was in the driveway) but I couldn't remember where I laid them down (I have ADHD to thank for that). Usually it's my wife's fault when I lose things because she staightens up and tidies after I blow through the house and she hides them (actually she puts them where they belong, but still....). But my wife was at work and couldn't be the fall guy (gal) for this one.

So after 45 minutes of looking and not finding them, I prayed about it. I sincerely asked God to help me. So about 3 hours later (when I had given up looking) I found them...on my messy bathroom vanity (which my wife has refused to even think about cleaning because it is...uh...disorganized). So in a way, it is her fault.

So God comes through again, finding something lost in my family. It is humbling. He answers prayer. God is good.

Is God Interested in the Small Stuff?

We went four wheeling in the mountains around Salida, CO on Friday for six hours. WOW! We went through thick aspen and Colorado Blue Spruce groves, clear streams, ghost towns and high mountain passes for a dusty, fun-filled day....that is until we got back to the cabin and my son declared, "Oh no, I can't find my wallet." His wallet contains his learners permit and about $350, money he earned by teaching swimming lessons all summer.

So for about an hour we looked in our SUV, around the cabin and in his wad of disorganized clothes (he doesn't believe in folding clothes before putting them in his suitcase). He grew more and more frustrated, surly and generally unlikable; I get the same way when I lose important things, so I understand. I reminded him that my wife and I had asked him to put at least half his money in my wife's purse for safe keeping (always helpful to hear "Not only did you lose your wallet, but you are are also irresponsible"....I'm losing 'dad points' here, I know).

So I called the ATV rental place (All Seasons Adventures in Salida, CO) and asked them to look on the ATVs we rented and call me back. Nothing. My son was afraid he had dropped it on the 50 or so miles of ATV trails and was thoroughly being cynical concerning the goodness of anyone who found it. So finally I suggested to him to pray for his wallet's safe return (OK, it wasn't a "suggestion" it was more of a edit). He grumbled about that so I took away his cell phone until he sincerely prayed out loud for God to help him. (OK, OK, so probably not the best motivation for prayer at the time but you didn't see the eye rolling that I got). But, surprise, surprise, he prayed a really cool prayer for God to help him find his wallet (and got his phone back).

So we headed back to Texas with a grumpy teenager, trusting that God was going to help answer this prayer. So four hours later, we were driving through Clayton, NM when my cell phone rang. It was the ATV rental place....they had found his wallet with all the money in it. I told my son the news and he whooped like a crazy man and had a smile from ear to ear.

Back home at last from Colorado. Even though it was 45 degrees when we left Colorado and was 86 degrees when we pulled into Irving at 2 am last night....God is cool. What an awesome God we serve, that he would care enough to answer a 16 year old's prayer for a wallet to be found. And by the way, if you are ever in Salida, CO and want to go ATV-ing, call All Season Adventures. They are really nice (and honest) folks.

Good ol' Fashion Prayer Meetin'

Have you ever been a part of a church or group whose sole purpose was to pray together? You know, a group of folks meeting weekly to spend an hour or two praying globally, nationally, locally and personally. It is very powerful and moving. Prayer is a vital connection to God, tapping into His love, power and blessing.

If you don't have a prayer group, start one. Invite other Christians over to pray. Be sure to have some folks outside your denomination and just for fun, throw in a Charismatic or two, just to keep it lively.

Here is some exercises for prayer meetin' fun:

1. Draw names out of a hat to pray for, each individual praying 5 minutes for that person.
2. Spend the entire time praying for one person (like the president, your pastor, someone sick, etc.)
3. Lay hands on someone and pray over them.
4. Divide up in smaller groups of 3 or 4 and pray for each person's concerns specifically.
5. Invite someone in to pray over them...like a sick person, discouraged or a pastor.
6. Write down prayers and give them to the person for whom you were praying.
7. Sing your prayers as a group.
8. Pray the Scripture together.
9. Pray while praise and worship music is going on in the back ground.
10. Pray the Scriptures together.
11. Pray the prayer of agreement together.
12. Pray where everyone is praying out loud at the same time (prayer concert).
13. Pray over the phone together during the week.
14. Take a weekend once a year and pray and fast the entire weekend (48 hours straight).
15. Fast for a day or two before the prayer meeting...have a meal after the meeting.

Get creative. Just create a weekly time to meet with other Christians for the sole purpose of prayer. Do it as an alternative to Bible class or small group meeting. Try it, God will like it!

Tongues as a Prayer Language

Romans 8.26 ...The Spirit helps us in our weakness; for we don't know how to pray the way we should. But the Spirit himself pleads on our behalf with groaning to deep for words....

I Cor. 14.2 For someone speaking in tongues is not speaking to people but to God, because no one can understand, since he is uttering mysteries in the power of the Spirit....A person speaking in a tongue does edify himself...I wish you could all speak in tongues....

I Cor. 14.14 For if I pray in a tongue, my spirit does pray, but my mind is unproductive...

Computers are operated by a language that I do not understand, which is, in fact so complicated, that it requires experts (called programmers) to understand it, interpret it and write it. That computer code operates all the internal workings of this laptop I am typing on, it speaks to the printer, the mother board, the programs it runs then, somehow, its translated into English. I see the product of a very complicated language interpreted so I can read it.

So here is how I explain praying in tongues. English is so limiting because it is a language we learned from other limited people. There are ideas, feelings, and spiritual things that my language just doesn't have a the words to express. However, never fear, God has pre-programmed us with the mother language, a language that supersedes English (or whatever language you learned as a child). The Holy Spirit has access to this embedded language that lies dormant until He has want of it.

Praying in tongues allows the Spirit to pray without having to go through the English language to come up with what to say. He speaks to God in God's language, which deeply expresses the spiritual realities without me trying to pollute it with my wants, whines, and demands. The embedded language, which I can not comprehend (and Scripture confirms that), is the Holy Spirit speaking. He takes what I need to God. He expresses praise to God in the purest form. He expresses my pain, my strivings, my groans directly to God without the hamper of the English language.

How does one pray in tongues? Good question. One must pray that the Spirit will take over the prayer. One must desire the Spirit to take over our language to express words we cannot understand. One must take a step out in faith to want a deeper, more edifying prayer life that is beyond our language skills and tendency to treat God like a giant vending machine with the wants and desires of our flesh.

I have prayed in tongues many times, even quietly to myself in my non-tongue-speaking church. It is incredible. It is meaningful. And I feel totally connected to the Father when I do it. It takes courage to approach God by this means.

What has been your experience with praying in tongues? If you have never done it, what do you think hinders you?

Father in Heaven..."Hey, There's a Chicken"

I find it very difficult to pray for any amount of time. If I think my prayers silently, within moments I am salmon fishing in Alaska, thinking about the 1,000,000,000,000 things I need to be doing, imagine what it would be like to be standing on the top of Mt. Elbert in Colorado, or think about how I could improve my landscaping, blog or life. You get the picture.

So what is the solution? How can one pray for hours on end without one, "Hey there's a chicken?" Simple. Pray out loud. Speak the words the Lord places in your thoughts. Give voice to the desires God lays on your heart.

I have prayed for 6 hours straight using this method and believe me (who is ADHD), if it works for me it will work for you. I can go an hour without a "mind trip to Alaska." Not one side trip to Mt. Elbert or to the duck in my attic last year. Nope. Just time with God, Him and I moving mountains, praying the things that come to mind.

Try it. Set aside an hour to pray out loud and see what happens...report back here about how it went.

"You Never Talk to Me" -God

How often do you pray? Really. Is your prayer formal or casual? Is it more scripted (similar to the prayer you said yesterday) or is it original material? I think the content of a person's prayer is a good indicator of their spiritual health. What do you think?

Here's the skinny on my prayer life. I pray at least 20 minutes a day, most days. Sometimes more ...gulp...and sometimes less. I always pray out loud (because if I think my prayers, they last less than 10 seconds). I used to talk to God in a more formal, scripted manner (because that was modeled for me in my spiritually formative years). Now, I talk to God as a friend, a friend who knows me inside out and who likes me (and I dig Him as well).

When He lays someone on my heart, I pray immediately for them. I pray until the thought of them passes, sometimes a minute, sometimes an hour. I pray boldly. I believe God moves mountains and prayer moves God. I ask for things that take a miracle like healing or well...miracles. I pray like, "Well of course God will do this, He likes me and wants to give me good things."

Sometimes I kid around with God. He's my friend, right!?! That's what I do with friends so why not with God. I try not to barge in on Him in prayer (He is busy being the ruler and creator of the universe) so I ask Him if I can talk. So far, He has said yes. Sometimes I ask Him goofy questions to see what He says. Sometimes I feel a "spiritual" smack upside the head.

I don't say "In Jesus name, Amen" at the end of prayers. I always put that in the beginning, "In the name of Jesus, Father I ask that you heal..." And I bless God alot and praise Him alot during prayer (because I think God is cool and awesome).

So there's the skinny on me. How about you?

80% Communication, 20% Words

Several years ago I was reading an article on communication. This particular article said that 80% of communication is nonverbal communication, 13% was tone, volume, timber of voice and the remaining 7% was the meaning of the actual words spoken. Crossed arms, furrowed brows, pursed lips and a cynical snarl communicates more richly than saying whatever words come to mind. I do know that if I walk into the house and my wife has "that look," I know I am in trouble without her saying a word. Our nonverbals are stronger indicators of how we really feel than the words we speak.

So....Let's take this lesson to church. What do your nonverbals communicate to God? Crossed arms (detached or angry), hands in pockets (guilt) and somber faces (Are we having fun yet?) may be communicating an entirely different message than our words say. So here is something to help if you are having a hard time connecting during church:

1. If you were a statue and the name of the statue was "PRAISE," take that position. Now sing a praise song from that position. Experiment with different positions and see which one feels the most congruent with what you want to communicate to God. Do this in you own private praise first then take it to church and try it out.

2. If you were a statue and the name of the statue was "I need you" take that position. Now sing a worship song from that position. Experiment with different positions and see which one communicates best the words you are saying. Do this in your own private worship first then take it out to church and try it out.

3. Be conscious of crossing your legs and arms during a sermon or Bible study. Uncross them and see if there is a difference in how you feel....perhaps more vulnerable? Do this for a month.

4. During prayer, nonverbally communicate with God. Learn to be more expressive verbally and nonverbally. Try it. It really makes a difference.

The reason many people raise their hands during praise is to be more congruent with the praise message. I know for myself I can express my praise better in that position. You the body position that expresses what you want to communicate.

So lets start communicating the other 80%. Try it then report back and let others know how it went.

Out Loud

When people come to me who want me to disciple them, one of the first exercises I have them do is spend time praying out loud. Verbalizing prayer is a crucial first step in communicating with God because... a HUGE part of communicating comes when we say things out loud. If I pray silently, I am distracted and constantly fight my brain's tendency to fantasize, drift and flit from one thought to another until I forget what I was doing (Hey there's a chicken!!) Be loosed tongue! Speak those words out loud and give them authority in the name of Jesus. God wants to HEAR our praise, HEAR out pleas, HEAR out thanksgiving, HEAR our worship, and HEAR our adoration of Him.

My wife gets irritated at me when I communicate with her through telepathy. First of all, I am not telepathic. To complicate matters even more, neither is she. She wants me to tell her what I need and how I feel about her. She wants me to openly and honestly talk about my day, my struggles, my highs and lows, what I liked and didn't like. If I thank her in my thoughts, she acts like I haven't thanked her at all. If I think she looks good but keep silent, she acts like I am not attracted to her. She wants to know me and the only she can is for me to speak. She wants more of me because talking to her opens up her heart to me.

And it opens up my heart to her. That's the main deal. And it is the same way with God. When I speak, each word declares what is true about me, good or bad. Each word is a covenant about what I have been doing, where I am, what my intentions are, and what I want. As I speak, my heart follows. The more passionately I speak in prayer, the more God responds to me. I quote, "Thou shall love the Lord thy God with all your heart..." I need to engage my heart and a great first step in to engage my mouth. My joys become God's joys and He celebrates my victories with me. My sorrows become His sorrows and He comforts me when I invite Him into it...into me. He listens when I am angry and gives me wisdom. He listens to my confusion and becomes my Counselor. When I speak, I find Him working with me, relating to my desperation, my pain and my passion.

So talk. I can pray a maximum of 60 seconds when I pray silently but I have prayed for 10 hours straight out loud (and could've gone longer but I got hungry). There is no precedent for silent prayer in scripture, it was always out loud. Jewish people may pray quietly, but not silently...it is all out loud. Try it and see if it doesn't make a difference in your prayer life.

PS. Pray quietly (not silently) at church when led in prayer and be amazed at what happens.

PPSS. If you want more from your Bible reading, read it out loud. Same with praise and worship.

Church speak

"In Jesus Name Amen" - Said as one word at the end of a prayer
Heal so-and-so "if it be your will" - Indicates one has not already discerned the will of God
"Use this money to further the kingdom"
"Guide, guard and direct us"
"Use this money to further the kingdom"
"Thank you for the cup as it represents Christ's blood shed..."
"Thank you for the bread as it represents Christ's body hanging..."
"Turn to song number..."
"Help us..."
"Let us pray"
"Let us not be..." Salad prayer..."Lettuce not be"
"Children will be dismissed to..."

What other rote statements have you heard?

We as human beings are prone to habitual ways of approaching life even in church. There is nothing wrong with the above statements, per se, they are not blasphemous or evil, necessarily. In fact, people who pray these prayers are still covered by the grace, mercy, and love or Christ (said tongue in cheek). The problem is that rote, mindless prayer that divorces our heart from prayer is like the husband telling his wife he loves her because he is supposed to (like right after she says "You never tell me you love me"), not because his heart is in it. It just ain't going to fly with her. She wants spontaneous statements that she can receive. So does God.

The challenge for us all is to access our hearts during prayer, praise and worship. Getting our spirit to commune with God in cooperation with our body, emotion and soul is much more pleasing to God...HE says so. When we engage in spontaneous, heart-felt anything with God, HE is pleased. God doesn't want a robotic, mindless, checklist-type prayer-life, praise-life, or worship-life. The Pharisees in Jesus' day did that nonstop and Jesus called them white-washed tombs...ouch. I believe the robotic thing actually hurts our heart and chokes the life out of our spirit, leaving us emptier, numb and with less faith in God. God wants engagement, connection and interchange.

I think we can practice things differently, being more open and expressive little by little frees our heart to express openly and honestly before God. The idea is to become less robotic and more expressive with God.

ALWAYS pray out loud. In church, pray quietly even when being led by someone else.

Try saying something different to God when you are spending time with Him.

Catch your own rote sentences and find a fresh new way to say the same things.

Write out your prayers and jot down more personal ways of speaking to God.

Express your love to God like you would express love to a lover...Like David did in Psalms.

Sing your prayers.

Ask God to give you the words to pray. Let the Holy Spirit convict your heart and give you the words to speak to God.

Allow fresh words and statements into your prayers and see if more of your heart engages in prayer.


Has anything else worked for you to engage your heart in prayer?

Experience the Spirit Exercise 39

In previous posts, I have outlined some exercises I have used to help people develop a passionate relationship with Christ. These are the exercises that had positive effects in people's spiritual walk. Feel free to ask about any of the exercises and I will try to explain the best I can. But don't just read them, try them on for size and see if they will help you in your walk with Christ.

39. Praying the prayer of agreement is a tool God has given us to pray with power.

Matthew 18.19-20. NIV "Again I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything you ask for, it will be done for you by my Father in heaven. For where two or three come together in my name, there I am with them."

Here is how to do it: After praise and worship, when someone is praying and they say something you agree with, verbally affirm (agree) with what is being prayed. So if someone prays, "Father, in the name of Jesus, heal Mark's knee, repair fractures on the bone, restore the bone as you created it be, so the power of your healing will be made known to Mark and his family." If you hear that prayer and sense the Spirit agreeing with it, verbalize agreement with 'Yes, Lord make it so,' or 'I agree,' or 'Yes Lord, in the name of Jesus, rain your healing down upon Mark's knee so your glory will be made known.'

I have always believed that prayer should be a group effort instead of one person leading and everyone going brain dead. Let the joy and passion of Christ dwell in the prayers of Christians and see what the Lord will do. I think it is OK for 2 or 3 or more people to pray at the same time, not trying to out do each other but praying in tandem and agreement with each other. Try it and see if you can't sense more of the presence of God praying the prayer of agreement. Get lively!

Experience the Spirit Exercises 26 - 38

26. While half the group is singing Jesus is Lord, have the other half pray out loud what God is laying on their hearts.

27. Teach people how to speak their heart to God. I turn to how David spoke his heart to the Father in the Psalms as an example of this. One of the reasons I think David was so special to God was because David, while watching sheep alone for days or weeks at a time, was constantly singing and talking to God as his life unfolded before God. In doing so, David became the man after God’s own heart, a friend of God. It helps to think about saying this to someone who deeply loves you as you say or sing them.

Most people are not used to speaking deeply nor do many have the language skills to do so. So what I do is hand out a list of sample intimate statements for them to say. I have them say each of these statements several times so they can get used to saying them without their flesh blocking it. Worship is saying these intimate things before God, to express our longings and desires, needs and deep felt emotions to God. Say these things only after a time of praise and worship, when we want to engage more of our hearts with God. In my experience, singing these statements makes me feel much more vulnerable than just thinking them or saying them. Here are some heartfelt statements we have said to God during worship time:

I receive your love Father
I receive your acceptance of me.
Thank you Lord for you love (kindness, goodness, peace, joy, presence, etc.)
Draw me into you, Father.
Your love is important to me, it is life and breath.
I delight in love
I feel happy when you are near me, Father
Thank you for choosing me, Lord, for making me one of your own
Thank you for your favor, Lord
Change me, Father, so I can give what you want from me
Thank you, Lord, for being inside me and filling my heart
Expressing Love
I long for you, oh Lord
My heart smiles when your presence is here
I delight in the time I spend with you, Father
I delight in my relationship with you, Jesus
I am pleased that you enjoy me
I need you
I need your love (Wisdom, Guidance, care, friendship, discernment, gifts)
Your love makes me a better man
I am desperate for you
I am glad you are my Father
It gives me pleasure to talk to you
I bless you through this trial, as you guide me and give me wisdom that I may be found pleasing in your sight.
I want you in my innermost being
My heart aches to be in your presence.

28. Use the word GLORIFY and sing it in harmony several (or many) times. Then sing the same word in harmony several (or many) times. Then layer that melody with other melodies and words that come to mind while many are singing the original word and melody.

29. While laying on hands and praying over someone (for healing or whatever) have half the people sing a prophetic song while the other half prays.

30. Sing a prophetic melody without words.

31. Half the group sings their desires, longings and yearnings to Him while the other half sings praise and worship songs.

32. Have half the group sing praise songs while the other breaks into two or threes (with people they don’t know) and give their testimony of how Christ has worked in their lives.

33. At the beginning of the group, tell people that no matter what they have done in their lives (give horrific examples) that they will be loved and accepted in this place.

34. What to do when the presence of God does show up. Usually there is a pleasant feeling that accompanies the presence of the Spirit of God. But, I have noticed, if I focus on the feeling, it goes away pretty quickly. Why? Feelings are flesh and if I focus on my feelings, I am not focusing on presence of Jesus. If I want to keep the feeling, I must focus on what got the feeling there in the first place, focusing on praising and worshiping God. So, when I sense God, I am going to continue praising God for His goodness, or declaring him Lord, or saying intimate loving things to Him so my heart can continue to stay in his presence.

35. For people who struggle with shame, guilt, fear or habitual sin, have them confess it out loud while the rest of the group is singing praise and worship songs. Have the singing be so loud that no matter how loud they confess it, the praise and worship drown out their confession.

36. Don’t allow discussions of a religious nature. Period. The best sure-fire way of running off God is to have a discussion about whether or not one should be baptized, whether or not churches should have weekly communion or whether or not Adam had a belly-button. Engaging the mind during a worship session has the opposite effect on connecting with God for a time. Intellectual discussions, religious arguments, and esoteric discussions on some religious point runs God (and people) off. I am sure you will have to experiment with this point (as most do) but as a rule, just do praise, worship and prayer.

If religious discussions happen (because sometimes people want to avoid the presence of God) reassert the purpose of the meeting and ask that discussions of that nature be held until the meeting is over, or ask them to discuss it on another day, away from the group. Or if you are of a more passive aggressive sort, just start playing praise music and singing....real loud.

37. During prayer time, have members who need prayer to state what their problem is. As a general rule, prayer is, first of all, for the people present at the meeting or for members not present because of illness or some other person there. We laid on hands on members, declared the lordship of Jesus, then asked God for the words to pray. Instruct members to speak what God lays on their heart.

38. During the meeting, time should be allowed for people to confess sins as the Holy Spirit convicts their hearts. This could happen at anytime during the meeting but I encourage leaders to ‘strike while the iron is hot,’ meaning ‘sooner rather than later.’ I have seen God convict men’s hearts about affairs, porn, murder, stealing and other sins during worship time. Allow them to speak so they can be free of that burden. If this has not happened during a meeting (spontaneous sin confession) then, near the end of the meeting, there should be a time set apart for confession of sins. Confession is good for the soul and if the group is going to be a healing place for people, then confession must be allowed.

An effective method of getting people to open up about themselves is to make a statement similar to this: "We want you to find healing in this group. If there is anything burdening you, please tell us so we can pray for you. If you have stolen a 100 grand from your work, had an affair, are addicted to porn, drugs, alcohol, had sex with your grandmother, dog or whatever, this is a safe place to confess it and be free from it. You can’t scare us with your story, whatever it is, we want to help you, not judge you." This statement creates a safe place for people to talk.