What's in Your Attic?

June 17, 2008 was an odd day in my life. I was sitting reading a book when I heard a loud noise, a crashing sound. I thought there had been a wreck in front of my house so I went to the door and found nothing amiss outside. hmmmmm. So I sat back down and was reading when I heard it again, only it sounded like it was coming from a different part of the house. So I walked toward where I thought the noise was coming from and I heard it again...coming from my attic. Cue spooky music.

So I got a broom (?!!? What am I going to do, sweep it to death?) and slowly pulled down the attic stairs, not knowing what was up there. I flicked on the light and a duck (yes, you read correctly, a duck) was looking down at me. Now, I first thought I was asleep and dreaming (you know, the ol' duck in the attic dream that everyone has...) or that I was seriously mentally ill and hallucinating (not ruling that out). Anyway, it quacked. I had never heard of ducks being in people's attic so this was an interesting problem to have.

So I got the swimming pool skimmer net and climbed into the attic. It flew around and I couldn't snag it so I called a neighbor (very similar to Phone a Friend on "Who wants to be a Millionaire") and told I had a duck in my attic. After about 3 minutes of laughter, I asked what I should do....Did he have a duck call that I could....more laughter. He said he would loan me his shotgun...har, har...very funny. Finally, after talking to three friends and enduring the same laughter and offer of a shotgun from each, one loaned me a duck call. To humiliate me worse, he stood and watched me call the duck... from the hall....in my house...what was I going to do if it came....? He was there to watch me more than anything.

Anyway, I never saw the duck again, I guess it flew out the way it came in. Seriously though, there was a duck up there and it left....flew south, I guess...It went were attic ducks go during the summer. I have told this story numerous times and it gets funnier (to me anyway) every time I tell it. It just goes to show that life can't be so bad that a duck in your attic (and the humiliation of people laughing at you....even a year later) can't make things a little more interesting. So now when things are bad, I just remind myself that there's not a duck in my attic, and smile.