I was talking to a friend who was unhappy in his marriage and he said,"I am miserable. We argue and fight all the time, she nags me 24/7, we threaten each other and I hate it. I am going to divorce her. I know divorce is wrong but God wants me to be happy..."
What?!?? Which god wants you to be happy??!!? That is not how my God works. I wish I had a god that was just interested in my happiness, my complete bliss. I wish I had a genie that would grant me 130,000 wishes a year and would be completely devoted to my emotional, spiritual, and physical fulfillment with little or no effort from me. I wish there was a god who would keep me young, allow me to eat like a hog and not gain weight, fix the lightening damage on my house, make weeds not grow in my flower beds, keep the outside temperature at 72 degrees (that god is in San Diego), and cause a 14,000 mountain to appear where Fort Worth is currently located. And while we're at it make my kidney stones disappear, my hair browner, and make my overall fat percentage drop to 3.5%. Give me a house that keeps itself clean, give me a ranch in Colorado, make my sons mind me, make my wife......well, you get the picture. If 'wishes and buts' were candy and nuts, we'd all have a Merry Christmas.
Think about children who get everything they want? Do you like being around them? Are they deep? Do they have character? I'll pass. Give me a friend who has struggled with life, to make ends meet, who has a sick child, who was hurt as a child and had to overcome, who has had a drug problem, sexual struggles or problems with relating to God. Someone who has had all this stuff happen to them but they overcame, depended on the grace and mercy of God, who has cried themselves to sleep only to wake up in the arms of God. I want to talk to that person, hug that person, pray with them and love them. They are real. They are deep. They are a deep drink of ice cold spring water on a hot and dreary day.
So, do you really want a god that is only interested in your happiness? To have a life without purpose other than fulfilling your every hedonistic whim? Really? Life without struggle is like water without wet. Struggle is what gives life meaning. Struggle and hardship are what make us turn to the Father for guidance and wisdom. If you think about it, struggle is the challenge of life that gives us character....uh oh, my dishwasher is making a funny noise....I am about to build some more character.
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AWESOME post, Chris! The One True God places challenges before us, so that we will grow more in Him, and be ready for the next one.
ReplyDeleteFor your friend, I'd tell him to get really close to Jesus, and if he's not saved, he needs to repent first and surrender his life (and wife) to the One who made them both. If he does that, I believe their relationship will be saved, as will they.
I am just concerned when you said your friend says that he and his spouse 'threaten' each other. That is violence and God does not condone violence or staying with someone who has become violent. Period.
ReplyDeleteYep! Have to agree. We are here to grow and learn. No growth or learning takes place in the comfort zone. For me, God is my safety net, ready to catch me should I fall from the high wire. I would never have known His love had I not stepped onto that wire in the first place. The depth in relationships is increased as we negotiate our struggles, and every worthwhile relationship has them. Your friend may be passing up an amazing opportunity for a deep, meaningful relationship in favour of ease. Have they tried counselling?
ReplyDeleteLive Life Happy!
I agree ksr. They threatened divorce, "I'm going to take everything you have," "I'm going to get the kids," etc. Nothing physical. I don't condone staying with a physically threatening person....until they get help.
ReplyDeleteGreat post today Dusty! I too like the people that are real, have experienced life, and faced challenges while still working towards a greater relationship with Jesus. However, I remember when the rafters were falling, termites were digging, and mold in the living room was growing that I wanted to slow down on the character development. It was like I was in a special summer class or something that crams a semester into like 4 weeks. I know how hard it is when you are tired and can only surrender to God your cares. God can make every morning new, and several times I have needed Him to.
ReplyDeleteJacqueline, I hear you...the greatest lessons may just be the ones that we can endure to the end...if we stick with it long enough, God relents and lets us learn the lesson.
ReplyDeleteSusan, I don't like the summer short course on character either. Give the the whole year to learn instead of making me do the entire course plus write papers and take tests in a four week period.
Thanks for dropping by you two....
I think there is some kind of balance...I do believe God wants us to ultimately be happy but we're also meant to grow, learn, and appreciate true happiness through our struggles.
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